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Say yes to Family - Issue 141
February 26, 2010
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This week Our study routine has been quite interrupted this week by opportunities to for the kids to spend time with their Dad doing some hands on things.
Live life with your kids!
Say "Yes" to Family
In this day and age we tend to rush from one commitment to another, we value productivity and we like to be seen as achieving. But at what cost? As a society we don’t tend to think about the cost of things – this is the age where we can have what we want – be it material things or success. But there is a cost associated with every decision.
When we say yes to one thing we are saying no to something else. For example,
Is it possible that that ‘something else’ was more important?
This creeps up on us in very insidious ways – we think we are saying yes to important things, to urgent things, to opportunities we can’t miss, to commitments we can’t lay aside. But is that the truth?
I get challenged by this myself. Opportunities abound – some of them I have to really think through – are these God opportunities or just good opportunities. Are these God’s best for me? God opportunities will put you in situations that are consistent with the other things He has laid on your heart, they will be consistent with His principles and His word.
One area that constantly gets challenged this way is the area of motherhood. There are so many situations, opportunities, and ideas that challenge the idea of what time I get to spend with my children. I’m sure you’ve had these too. So many things crowd in on us and it is hard to keep your focus on being a mother: Ministry, Business, and Friends for example.
It isn’t just about spending time with our children though – our time needs to be spent well. Our time is to be spent building and strengthening our relationship with our children as well as teaching them in the ways of the Lord. Do you do more of one than the other?
When we look at our days, when we fill in our diaries, when we make our commitments do we consider as a priority when we are going to spend time with our children? Do we consider when we are going to teach and train them? Or do these things just get the leftovers? Even as a homeschool mum, I can slot in the ‘education’ part to our day, fill in the rest with other commitments and not really spend relational time with my children.
Why do we spend time getting to know our friends and making new friends and yet we don’t get to know our children, and more significantly, they don’t get to know us. A relationship is a two way thing – and it is more than living in a house together and eating meals together. We need to know our children – what they like, dislike, what makes them tick, what their dreams and passions are. And our children need to know us – what we like, dislike, what makes us tick, what our dreams and passions are, and what our journeys have been. This takes time.
In the 80’s there was a way of thinking that said parents need to give their children quality time. It was supposedly a balm for the soul when parents were feeling guilty about not giving their children enough time. Quality was what counted. This is a lie. We need to give our children quantity and quality time if we are to build relationships with them and be an influence in their life.
Are you saying ‘yes’ to family?
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